At this point in time it feels like everything that winds up in the movie theater is a remake, a sequel, or an adaptation. So of course we couldn’t possibly really think there’s any good reason to ask for even more remakes, right? Wrong. If you ask us, one of the problems with Hollywood’s love of remaking movies is that, almost without fail, they simply pick the wrong movies to remake. Here are some titles we’d be totally fine with seeing reappear on the big screen. 8.
These days, most people probably know Flash Gordon as a running gag in the movie Ted, and for its insanely catchy theme song that was performed by Queen. However, the history of Flash Gordon is a long one, as it began as a comic strip in 1934, and was designed to compete with Buck Rogers. Yet somehow we’ve never gotten a decent adaptation, with the only real attempts being the 1980 film and a failed TV series that aired in 2007. One reason we may never see Flash come to the big screen in a spectacular way, of course, is the miserable failure of movies like John Carter, but we would still love to see Flash Gordon make his way back to Hollywood. With the insane popularity of comic book movies, there’s never been a better time, either.
The Island of Dr. Moreau
The Island of Dr. Moreau is at this point very sadly remembered mostly for being that movie in which Marlon Brando got extremely fat and plodded around in a muumuu with a strange little sidekick. What most people probably don’t realize is that, laughable film adaptation aside, it was based on a classic science fiction novel by HG Wells. The novel was about moral responsibility, pain, cruelty, and basically whether or not it is okay for man to try to play god. Obviously, not a single bit of that came through in the movie, and that’s why it desperately needs to be remade, and this time if someone could actually try to make it, you know, good? That’d be okay with us.
Back in 1996, which coincidentally is the same year that we got Brando’s Island of Dr. Moreau, an adaptation of the long running comic strip The Phantom was released, starring Billy Zane and Kristy Swanson. It was a goofy, mildly pleasant movie but wasn’t nearly successful enough to garner a sequel, which is a real shame because the Phantom is a terrific character. Basically, for the uninitiated, the Phantom isn’t just one guy, it’s an entire line of crime fighters who pass the responsibility on from father to son, swearing an oath to protect the world from evil. He doesn’t have any powers, and instead is just strong, brilliant, and because there is always a Phantom over the years, decades, and centuries, he is able to use the myth that he’s an immortal, well, phantom to intimidate evildoers. And you’re telling us that wouldn’t make for an awesome series of movies?
In 1983, a film that would go on to become something of a cult classic called WarGames was released, starring Matthew Broderick as a young computer hacker who very nearly, and very unwittingly, starts World War III by accessing what he thinks is a game but is actually full access to America’s nuclear arsenal. While we don’t have the Cold War to support a remake right now, it’s not like there isn’t the possibility of another World War. You could even update it and, rather than a random computer hacker who likes video games, make the central character a member of the hacker group Anonymous, trying to do good but unbeknownst to him is on the verge of starting a World War with China or North Korea. Hell, something similar has actually happened in real life when a pair of hackers named Mathew Bevan and Richard Pryce hacked into an American Air Force Base looking for evidence of aliens, all the while very nearly starting a new war while the US scrambled to figure out who the hell was accessing their top secret files.