The Five Failed Video Game Consoles (That Had it Coming)

  • August 16, 2010
  • 101,149
  • Entertainment
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4.

Tiger R-Zone

tiger

Hey, remember the Virtual Boy? Boy, that was a terrible idea, huh? Who thought that was going to take off? Well, Tiger Electronics, apparently.

Tiger made their money in the '80s with LCD "games" that were based off of popular cartoons and, most insidiously, popular video games. They were designed to sit near toy store counters and catch the eyes of small children, who would harass their parents into buying the thing. Then they'd get it home, play it for five minutes, and realize they'd been had. Tiger Electronics probably smashed more childhood illusions of kindness and decency than Sammy Sosa and the Westboro Baptist Church combined.

Anyway, the R-Zone was the unholy love child of those terrible LCD games and the Virtual Boy, and it stinks just as much as it sounds like. The gameplay was exactly the same for each game, except now it was floating in front of your face instead of having you pound the same repetitive patterns into the controller.

5.

The Game Boy Micro

micro

In the history of portable gaming, there's one name that towers above them all: Nintendo. Starting with the Game Boy leading right up to the Nintendo DS, Nintendo has taken all comers and basically murdered them. But picking on Atari…or Nokia…or Sega…or Sony…or, well, most of Nintendo's competitors isn't much fun. So let's pick on the big guy itself, and the Game Boy Micro.

Let's see here: you've got the innovative DS on the market, which already plays Game Boy Advance games, and which is insanely popular, not to mention competitively priced. So…why does the Game Boy Micro, which can't even play classic Game Boy games or use peripherals like the e-Reader, and is so tiny you can literally fit it in the palm of your hand, even exist?

The Game Boy Micro was so popular a lot of stores just pretended it didn't exist, and by the time everybody gave up on tracking its sales, it had only sold 2.42 million worldwide. To give you an idea how sad that is, the DS and its variants have sold 128 million worldwide, more than even the Wii.

Funny how a system that's hard to use and fills no need isn't popular. Seriously, Nintendo, what are you going to do next? Release the Jaguar Micro?

Was your favorite game subject to controversy, even if it didn't show hookers getting stabbed? Let us know in the comments! Written by Dan Seitz – Copyrighted © www.weirdworm.com Image Sources

Image sources:

  • - Pioneer LaserActive: http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/b/b3/Pioneer_LaserActive_CLD-A100.jpg
  • - The Sega Nomad: http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/f/fe/Genesis_Nomad.jpg
  • - The Apple Pippin: http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/8/8f/Pippinfront.jpg
  • - Tiger R-Zone: http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/8/8a/R-Zone_Headgear_01.JPG
  • - The Game Boy Micro: http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/0/0d/Game_boy_micro_all_black.JPG
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