Accelerated Tax Refunds, We Git Yo Money Quick!
Seriously, who would have thought that local ads would feature so many singers? However unlike previous rappers on our list, IllKK of Shreveport, Louisiana actually has some charisma, discernable talent and stands a decent chance of making it one day. No joke, this kid has some lyrics, knows how to flow and actually manages to hold your attention for a commercial that is otherwise simply about tax refunds (refunds given by his mama who is “cold”). Depending where you are, economically speaking, simply getting a tax refund can be a big deal or it may be just another day of trivial paper work - which may not even yield much of a reward at all. Anyway, IllKK is somewhat reminiscent of the young 90’s rapper, Shyheim from Wu-Tang affiliate fame.
VERDICT – SO BAD IT’S GOOD
Martin Fine Furniture…Cowboys, Pirates, Leprechauns,…
The first thing that comes to our minds when thinking of fine furniture certainly isn’t elderly cowboys haphazardly firing off their pistols and comical Western antics. However, the wacky folks at Martin Fine Furniture and Marty McDermott apparently felt a cowboy theme was the way to go to promote the oldest fine furniture store in Indianapolis. Well Yee – f***ing - Haw, if you say so Marty.
Fortunately, the owners of this furniture shop are aware that cowboys may not be for everyone so they’ve also had ads running featuring pirates, leprechauns and even a Gilligan’s Island theme. Marketing genius!
What works best about all of these “unique” low budget themes is that they each compliment the stores extremely conservative and elegant website…
VERDICT – SO BAD IT’S BAD
“Gurl you Aint Hurd?” Sexy Job Fair Girls
The next ad is for a job fair in Orlando Fashion Square Mall where apparently thirty different companies were seeking to hire young girls well versed in the latest slang. Where to begin with this one? First there are the two females who are attractive in a late night Cinemax flick kind of way. Secondly, there’s the amateur acting which combined with the girls visible cleavage appropriately fuels the fantasy most guys assume will play out in the coming moments. Guaranteed many a male showed up at that job fair with more than a resume in their hands.
Although the girls are using casual slang you’d think they might be accustomed to, they speak it as though it’s a complex foreign language they learned five minutes prior to shooting. Also, the - various - awkward - pauses - are - particularly - mysterious. If real life actually played out like this, the world would be a much more interesting place.
VERDICT – SO BAD IT’S BAD (but hot)
“Pay Me Now” or I’ll See You in Hell
Attorney Denvil Crowe of Tupelo Mississippi is all about showmanship. That’s exactly why he hired Tanner Wakins (aka the big guy who cuts meat at the local Crosstown Kroger) to appear in his ad as a tough guy debt collector in the now infamous law firm commercial.
Wakins was actually asked by his mother to star in the local ad which subsequently turned him into a local celebrity. "I knew it'd be funny at the time, but to be honest with you, I am still shocked at how popular it is." How could it not be popular though? The ad is quite surreal as it features Watkins posing in front of a hellish wall of flames repeatedly stating "Pay me, pay me, pay me. Pay me, pay me now." See for yourself…
Indeed the ad seems more like a bizarre wrestling promo for Kane than a traditional spot for a lawyer.
VERDICT – SO BAD IT’S GOOD
- - Schweig Engel’s Dinosaurs, Decapitations and Superheroes: http://img718.imageshack.us/img718/6104/jurrass.jpg
- - Big Pimpin’ Credit Mac Daddy: http://img691.imageshack.us/img691/8070/macdaddyyyyyyyyyy.jpg m http://img256.imageshack.us/img256/9017/macdaddy.jpg
- - 1-800 Victim2 and their Accident Prone Dancing Squirrel: http://img829.imageshack.us/img829/8461/1800p.jpg http://img832.imageshack.us/img832/5658/1800v.jpg
- - Flea Market Montgomery aka Cleveland Brown’s Inspiration: http://img821.imageshack.us/img821/799/fealmarket.jpg
- - Rev Rob’s Apple Auto Sales Campaign of Terror: http://img831.imageshack.us/img831/520/revrob.jpg
- - Accelerated Tax Refunds, We Git Yo Money Quick!: http://img535.imageshack.us/img535/6083/taxb.jpg
- - Martin Fine Furniture…Cowboys, Pirates, Leprechauns, the Professor and Mary Ann…: http://img716.imageshack.us/img716/9055/wtfsf.jpg http://img841.imageshack.us/img841/2356/wtf2a.jpg
- - “Gurl you Aint Hurd?” Sexy Job Fair Girls: http://img186.imageshack.us/img186/4366/sohotp.jpg http://img3.imageshack.us/img3/5632/planth.jpg
- - “Pay Me Now” or I’ll See You in Hell: http://img695.imageshack.us/img695/7160/fupayme.jpg http://img214.imageshack.us/img214/613/wwwwy.jpg http://img97.imageshack.us/img97/9358/24360660.jpg