Chocolate Can Have High Lead Content:
Of course, chocolate must have some drawbacks as well, if just to make the idea of not pooping out rainbows after consuming chocolate more believable. This is where the anti-good-times-squad responsible for some negative chocolate research takes the helm of our ship. These researchers found that while average lead concentration in cocoa beans in Nigeria was quite low, somewhere along the manufacturing process of cocoa and chocolate products, the lead concentration becomes high enough to make milk chocolate candy bars have the fourth highest average lead content among all food items in the U.S. In Australia, they took the second highest rank.
So, what exactly is so bad about lead? Lead is harmful, especially to children, as research suggests that it can not only cause poisoning in children, but can also reduce their IQ permanently. We are not talking huge amounts of lead; we are talking about concentrations of less than 10 micrograms per deciliter in blood. That’s metric for “not that much”. The milk chocolate candy bars mentioned above were said to have 27 nanograms of lead content per gram of the chocolate.
Basically, Willy Wonka has contributed to the creation of more zombies than Resident Evil's Umbrella Corporation.
Chocolate Was Revered by the Aztecs:
According to this source, the Aztecs thought the cocoa plant had been brought by a god from heaven. Cocoa was made into a drink, believed to be a health elixir, which is a hell of a lot like what the study of heart attack survivors makes it out to be. Adding to the same point, they believed wisdom and power came from eating the fruit of the cocoa tree. This explains why the Aztecs were ruled by a race of cocoa tree dwelling monkeys.
But perhaps they just revered the ingredients of chocolate, you may think. Where's the proof that chocolate did not lose its value? Well, according to the same source, chocolate drinks were considered so prestigious that they were served in golden goblets that were discarded after a single use. We at Weird Worm are guessing the Aztecs were not fully aware of the concepts of "water," "washing" and "not being insane."
Speaking of value, the website above goes on to mention that the Aztecs even used cocoa beans for currency, demanding payment in cocoa after conquering tribes. On the plus side, it probably made it much easier to detect counterfeit payments.
Women Prefer Chocolate Over Sex:
According to these three reports, a poll conducted in Britain found that women there seem to value chocolate more than sex. Apparently, while eighty-seven percent of men would choose sex over chocolate, fifty-two percent of the women would rather eat chocolate than have sex. Apparently the Limeys still aren’t ready to take the next step of trying to combine the two by having sex with chocolate.
The poll results do not stop there: they go on to show that thirty percent of women confess to fantasizing about chocolate during the day, compared to just eighteen percent of women who admitted to fantasizing about sex. We at Weird Worm have already started stocking up on chocolate. Now, if we can just figure out a way to use it without having to have sex with British women.
Know something else crazy about the beloved brown stuff? Why not post a comment below?
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- - Chocolate is Better than Kissing:: http://0.tqn.com/d/chemistry/1/0/J/i/madscientist2.jpg
- - Chocolate Helps Heart Attack Survivors:: http://www.thephoenixforce.com/CYCLOPS6.jpg
- - Chocolate Can Have High Lead Content:: http://blog.prasi.at/wp-content/uploads/2009/07/lolcat.JPG
- - Chocolate Was Revered by the Aztecs:: http://scienceblogs.com/purepedantry/upload/2007/05/normal_ABM-capuchin%20monkey-monteverde.jpg
- - Women Prefer Chocolate Over Sex:: http://www.yowazzup.com/food/images/cold-storage/gingerbread-man.jpg