Colin “Breakfast of Runner-Ups” Montgomerie
We’d call him “Breakfast of Champions” Montgomerie, except for the fact that Monty has never really won anything of significance on the Professional Golf Association tour. Anyway, back in 2003 the crotchety golfer from the UK was thought to be one of the frontrunners to win the 132ndBritish Open Championship and saw his week at Royal St. George’s get off to a shaky start. You could say he tumbled right out of the gate. And by that, of course, we mean he tripped and fell on his way to breakfast and was forced to withdraw after playing just six holes.
Monty was on his way to town to grab a bite before heading to the range to hit some balls when he thought he felt a drop of rain, looked up and missed a step. He went sprawling, tried to brace himself and badly injured his hand. It was an embarrassing moment for the Scot, by his own admission, and it cost him one of the only chances he may have ever had at bringing home a major victory. The bottom line is that tripping in the cereal aisle is about the closest Colin Montgomerie will ever get to finding himself on a Wheaties box. Oh well, at least he’s got his Ryder Cup success to fall back on. Ha, fall back on. See what we did there? That was awesome.
Adam “DVD” Eaton
Now here’s one we can sort of relate to. You know that security tape that comes on DVD’s, CD’s and video games? That annoying, thin strip of tape that is unreasonably difficult to remove and makes you want to just take a jackhammer to the package and go nuts? Well, big league pitcher Adam Eaton didn’t use a jackhammer, but he did try to get a little violent with a new DVD he had bought. Eaton was using a small knife to try to get the packaging open, slipped, and somehow stabbed himself in the gut. Naturally, he was forced to miss his next start.
Now we could go a lot of directions on this one, like pointing out that Eaton clearly didn’t know much about knife safety if he was somehow angling the very sharp weapon in such a manner that he actually could stab himself. But frankly, we just feel sorry for him, because we cannot stress enough how annoying that security tape is. So buck up, Adam, we’ve all been bested by DVD packaging at one time or another.
Know some more stupid stories that take our favorite millionaires down a few pegs? Play ball in the comments section!
- - “Sneezing” Sammy Sosa: http://blogs.suntimes.com/sportsprose/sammy-sosa-uniform.jpg
- - Ted “Twit” Dexter: http://p.imgci.com/db/PICTURES/CMS/47100/47106.jpg
- - “Iron” John Smoltz: http://www.mouthpiecesports.com/blogmedia/2009/01/smoltz.jpg
- - Colin “Breakfast of Runner-Ups” Montgomerie: http://www.sportsrubbish.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/07/colin-montgomerie-pirates-3.jpg
- - Adam “DVD” Eaton: http://www.hotstovephilly.com/wordpress/wp-content/uploads/eaton1.jpg