14 Bizarre Kids Cereal Boxes

  • September 26, 2010
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  • Lifestyle
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Rice Honeys

This article will not judge you if cross dressing is your thing, but we will judge your choice of outfit, and harshly.


If you are thinking of becoming a drag queen, put more thought into your fashion sense. Using Mad Libs to pick your theme will only result in "Space Agent Spy Rice Honey" and you'll never win the Pride Week contest that way.


Kellogg’s Apple Jacks

We can't help but fear that after years of bobbing for apples, this mascot would bob for our souls as soon as we opened the box.



Cheerios - Counterfeit Confederate Money

Cheerios are good for your heart and health, but unfortunately is not above supporting counterfeiting the currency of short lived, secessionist government. The influx of counterfeit Confederate dollars devaluing the currency probably hit secessionist gun shops worse than the collapse of the Liberty dollar in 2009.

While the south is a good market for cereal sales, we’re sure that rather than promoting a pro-slave government you could just invent a deep fried cereal on a stick and get better results.



Prince of Thieves EABOD


It used to be that you had to actually say or type to tell someone to go eat a bowl of dicks (EABOD). Now you can literally give them a bowl to eat, no words needed.


Bigg Mixx


A Kellogg's character meant to promote a cereal made up of all the other cereals, which makes it the Seltzer and Friedberg of breakfast cereals.

Even the product description was stupid and jokes quickly circulated that the cereal was made up of cereal swept off the factory floor.


Bart Simpson "Eat My Shorts" Cereal


This was only released in the United Kingdom. We shudder to think of the Japanese equivalent.




Those that fear a Sarah Palin presidency should remember the dark days of 1992 when voters, dissatisfied with both major parties, were willing to rally behind anyone else. Steve Urkel, who was riding high on the fame of Family Matters, made his move via the cereal box. Luckily, Ross Perot stepped in, sparing us a weekly international crisis caused by President Urkel’s incompetence and crippling cheese shortages.

Did we miss your favorite insane, sugar-laden pseudo-drug? Post it below! Written by Philip Moon – Copyrighted © www.weirdworm.com Image Sources

Image sources:

  • - Corn Crackos: http://theimaginaryworld.com/bslt28.jpg http://theimaginaryworld.com/tic386.jpg http://theimaginaryworld.com/opost26.jpg
  • - Mr. Muscle: http://theimaginaryworld.com/mrmuscle01.jpg http://theimaginaryworld.com/mrmuscle02.jpg
  • - Rice Krinkles: http://theimaginaryworld.com/box79.jpg
  • - Grins & Smiles & Giggles & Laughs: http://theimaginaryworld.com/box1309.jpg http://theimaginaryworld.com/box1310.jpg
  • - Crispy Critters: http://theimaginaryworld.com/pre470.jpg
  • - Punch Crunch: http://theimaginaryworld.com/box1262.jpg
  • - Quisp/Quake/Quangaroo : http://theimaginaryworld.com/box752.jpg http://www.mrbreakfast.com/cereal/quakes_two.jpg http://theimaginaryworld.com/box273.jpg http://theimaginaryworld.com/box274.jpg http://theimaginaryworld.com/tic313.jpg
  • - Rice Honeys: http://theimaginaryworld.com/box685.jpg
  • - Kellogg’s Apple Jacks: http://theimaginaryworld.com/box1020.jpg
  • - Cheerios - Counterfeit Confederate Money: http://theimaginaryworld.com/box531.jpg
  • - Prince of Thieves EABOD: http://www.mrbreakfast.com/ucp/283_1540_ucp.jpg
  • - Bigg Mixx: http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/1/1b/BiggMixxBox.png
  • - Bart Simpson "Eat My Shorts" Cereal: http://simpsonscollectors.com/images/releases/Eat_My_Shorts_Cereal.jpg
  • - Urkel-Os: http://www.gunaxin.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/02/urkel-os.jpg