source: sydneyolympicpark.com.au

These are the people who work on breaking and re-breaking world records that no one in their right mind would ever even consider as a legitimate thing. You know, the records that are set by people who have to be either extremely demented or excessively lonely, though chances are with most of these records it’s a little bit from both columns. Here are some of the most absurd records anyone has ever bothered to set.

It’s always nice to leave your mark on the world. Everyone wants to be remembered for something and not simply fade into obscurity when they pass. But of course, some people take more extreme steps to be remembered than others and work toward accomplishments that leave most of us scratching our heads and asking, simply, “why?”

13Most Straws Stuffed Into a Mouth

Most Straws Stuffed Into a Mouth
source: todayilearned.co.uk

Believe it or not, someone looked a pile of more than 400 straws and thought, “I can probably jam those all into my mouth.”

12Longest Nose

Longest Nose
source: itthing.com

Seems strange that bad genetics can help you set a record, but such was the case with Mehmet Ozyurek and his 8.8-centimeter nose.

11Most Concrete Blocks Broken While Holding an Egg

Most Concrete Blocks Broken While Holding an Egg
source: cdn.list25.com

Okay, we get the breaking concrete blocks part, that’s impressive – but why on earth would anyone bother to hold a raw egg while doing it?

10Most Time Spent Instant Messaging

Most Time Spent Instant Messaging
source: image source

image source

Finally, a world record based on being horribly antisocial and spending an inordinate amount of time on the computer!

9Largest Collection of Nike Shoes

Largest Collection of Nike Shoes
source: ahametals.com

Some dude named Jordan Geller has, for whatever reason, decided it would be an awesome idea to college more than 2,500 pairs of Nike shoes to set this record.

8Tallest Mohawk

Tallest Mohawk
source: cdn.japandailypress.com

Kazuhiro Watanabe has the world’s tallest mohawk and we have to ask: how on earth does he get hair product all the way to the top?

7Most Violins Played at Once

Most Violins Played at Once
source: iwebstreet.com

This is a record held by a Ukrainian named Oleksandr Bozhyk, and we just have to point out no one said most violins played well.

6Worlds Fastest Toilet

source: 24sata.hr

Of all the records in the world, this is maybe the most pointless since, last we checked, most of us don’t care whether our toilets can zip along at high speed.

5Fastest Dogs on Tricycles

source: aparat.com

If you’re wondering who on earth would even attempt something this bizarre, the answer is, of course, the Japanese.

4Largest Gathering of People Dressed as Smurfs

source: a-zknowledge.blogspot.com

On the plus side, it’s easy to get in on a record like this, but on the negative side, you’d never want to admit to taking part in a record like this.

3Biggest Rubber Band Ball

source: i.dailymail.co.uk

It took Joel Waul six years to put together his massive rubber band ball, which weighs nearly five tons and was sure his parents are very proud of him – probably for something else.

2Largest Collection of Barbies

source: worldrecordacademy.com

A German woman named Bettina Dorfmann owns more than 15,000 Barbie dolls and were going to go ahead and guess not a lot of friends to show them off to.

1Most Bees on a Person

source: softpedia.com

Chinese beekeeper She Ping holds the world record by having 331,000 bees on him at once, a record we assume will stand because no one else is insane enough to try to top that.